ByJared Jones, writer at
Writer. Editor. Zombie survival strategist. Follow me on Twitter @JJWritesStuff
Jared Jones

At UFC Halifax last night, heavyweight slugger Derrick Lewis put Travis Browne to sleep and then delivered one of the greatest post-fight interviews of all time, declaring (among other things) that he wasn't actually hurt by Browne's body shots, but simply "had to boo-boo."

Speaking with Karyn Bryant shortly thereafter, Lewis expanded on his...digestive issues.

“I’m holding my gas in and trying to breathe at the same time, I just didn’t want to (expletive) on national TV" said Lewis. "Especially with this internet going around, making memes of me, nah, I couldn’t have that. No Charlie Brown.”

Sporting a fun-sized "interim" belt, Lewis added that he knew he had the fight won when he made Browne do "his world famous baby deer walk" before reiterating his desire to take a few months off to recover from "all the training and sex I've been having." And just like that, a new king of slams was crowned.

Who does "The Black Beast" want next?

Though it looks we won't be seeing Lewis step back into the Octagon for a few months, "The Black Beast" barely let Gilbert Melendez finish his question about who he'd like to return against before giving his answer.

"Mark Hunt," said Lewis.


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