We have come to the startling conclusion that Conor McGregor is a time-traveling, autonomous robot from the distant future.
We don't know exactly when, but at some point, a blinding ball of blue light appeared in Ireland, and a nude Celtic warrior materialized through the smoke. He looked real, but it was simply tattooed-tissue over a metal endoskeleton that asked the nearest person for all their Louis Vuitton, the keys to their Rolls-Royce and where he could find two #UFC titles.
The death-touch of his left hand and uncanny way of predicting events that have yet to occur solidifies this theory.
Before McGregor made history at #UFC205, he foretold the future. Ever since arriving to the UFC, McGregor has informed everyone he came into contact with exactly what he would do — then proceeded to do it. He tweeted that he would have two titles and demand shares in the company years ago. People started to call McGregor "Mystic Mac" but no one ever sat and thought that maybe he's not clairvoyant, maybe he's simply from a different time altogether.
The only hiccup through many years of being the McNostradmus of his own career, was #NateDiaz. The D209 unit is even more advanced than the McG145 and 155 models. Diaz is a living, cybernetic cannabinoid organism. He appears in multiple different timelines to try and prevent McGregor from completing his mission.
The brief dark night of the soul as Diaz moved in to change all timelines was thwarted at #UFC202 in a battle that had D209 leaking CBD oil all over the Octagon. In the end, it was a narrow victory for McGregor, and the threat to our timeline may not be over. Through dark clouds, a war is still brewing and Diaz may fight McGregor again, for McGregor has said so. And we know what he says, goes.
Until the final war of the machines, read the unbelievable accounts throughout the timeline we're conscious of, and take in the overwhelming evidence that McGregor is from the future.
The Definitive List of McGregor's Time-Bending Predictions:
- Bet Dana White $3.5 million that he'd KO Chad Mendes in the second round.
- Selling out arenas just before UFC debut and he'd be wearing a suit next time.